After having some epic fails in my life in the last little while, I've finally begun to learn som big lessons through them and thought that I'd share the list with you:

1) Take the tough stuff (and the REALLY tough stuff) and learn from it.

I know it's an easy concept to grasp, but it's not so easy to put into practice. For me I keep saying, "I'm gonna change..." this or that, but nothing ever comes from it. Yeah, life gives us lots of crap, but the BIGGEST mistake that someone can make is to not learn from it and move forward. Log it in your brain and use past experiences as ways to see how you should handle things next time around. And let's face it, there's always going to be a next time around.

 

2) Don't take anything for granted. Always be thankful for what you do have.

Think about it. What are you thankful for today?

 

3) Spend as much time with the poeple you love as possible.

Yeah, you may need to tweek the times that you have to get various things done, but never cancel out on people you love. You never know what's going to happen in life, and how much more quality time you're going to get with these people. Whether it be distance, relationship strain, or death, you never know how much time you have left. I'm not saying this to be a downer, just realize, the people you have in your life are God's gift to you, and not taking advantage of the time you have with people is just plain wrong.

 

So, a lesson I learned this week is that I need to give myself more time dedicated to school work and not procrastinate so much. I learned that I do much better if I give myself just that little bit of extra time.

I'm so thankful for my mom as of late. She's been my rock, my support, and a best friend to me during this rough patch in my life. I'm also completetly thanful for old friends and getting to see them this week. It's been such a blessing to get to spend time with two of my close friends this weekend.

So that's your peek into my mind for the evening.

-Until next time.

 I didn't sleep till LATE last night. Stressed at the thought of a landmark date of a certain event being six months ago today. I couldn't get passed the idea that all of this happened six months ago. My mind was in a fury trying to fix everything that's happened over the last six months. I couldn't bear that half a year of my life has changed me so drastically...

And then today, I actually thought about this. Here I had been stressed out at the idea of things being the way they have been for half a year. Why in the heck was I looking at it that way? I am WAY more blessed than I can even imagine at the thought of all of the good things that have taken place.

God provided me with people who loved (and still love) me unconditionally. He provided me with people to stick by me no matter what and see my potential for greatness. I am a changed woman. I need to not look at what I have lost in all of this time, but what I have gained.

I have gained SO MUCH! I've gained a new-found confidence in myself. I've gained an understanding of myself. I've gained insight to my relationship with God, and with relationships with people. I've gained a new set of things to smile about.....

*An attention span :-p*
*A renewed love for reading*
*I've finally seen The Matrix and LOVE it...Thanks Sarah :)*
*DENMARK*
*A new and odd vocabulary from an interesting excursion*
*A roadtrip with a friend in a red convertible*
*I found out what I DON'T want out of life*
*Pedicures*
*VIVA LA VIDA*
...and the list could go on...

As I'm sitting here, I'll give you a picture of what my life looks like, externally, and internally.

I'm listening to the song, "Only You" by David Crowder Band. Contemplating what I've read in the Word today and beginning to see where I've been going wrong lately. Yesterday, I might as well have been pushed into the pool that I was sitting at because that's how much of a shocker the day was. It really hit me that I was not going to be at Liberty this semester. I realized that a few of the people who are normally at the church picnic were at Liberty and I was not. I realized that three of my best friends were there. I was not. I had mostly lost all of the connections that I had at home in the two years that I was away and now I felt more lonely than I had in years. Like a was a new kid in school or something, only specifically different because it wasn't like I didn't know anyone at all. I was in a new situation in an old place.

I kind of feel the same way in my living situation. Even though I've been home for the summers, it's almost like I have to move in again because I need to get used to actually LIVING at home again. I have to make things feel permanent. I have to clean my room and not PACK. Currently everything's in disarray because I've been so busy. I wish that I could just leave the mess behind, but that doesn't seem to work in a house...it also doesn't work in emotions. I can't leave the mess behind. I have to deal with things. And apparently I have to sort of be in the mess to clean it up. So, that's what I'm dealing with right now...